Whatever the cementers want, the cementers get! We are offering caps, polo shirts, sweatshirts, and other cool stuff celebrating President Trump and COVFEFE. 

Supplies are limited! When they're gone, they're gone!

You will receive your order in about three weeks. Each item is individually created for you by a master craftsman with impeccable conservative credentials.

A "Tribute" fee of $9.95 will be added to each order. The purpose of this fee is to line the pockets of the Powers That Be. And to pay for shipping and handling.

Your satisfaction is guaranteed. However, your satisfaction in President Trump is not guaranteed. Returning something because you're "off the Trump Train!" would be uncool.

EVERYTHING COMES EMBROIDERED WITH THE EXCLUSIVE SPARTA REPORT COVFEFE LOGO!

The cap is the Port Authority® Pigment Print Distressed Cap. C924 This cap has an oiled leather look thanks to a pigment print. Distressing and contrast stitching add to its worn-in, outdoorsy style. The shirt is the Port Authority® Stain-Resistant Polo K510 and ladies L510.

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You may pay with a PayPal account or with any credit card. A PayPal account is not required.

If you'd like to talk with a real person* before placing your order, place all the items you want in your shopping cart, press SUBMIT SHOPPING CART, fill out your information and tell us how we can help you in "Additional/Special Instructions." When you press INQUIRE ONLY, we receive an email with everything you just entered and will get back with you as quickly as we can.

Or just click the email link and ask us a question. Or email spartareportstore@gmail.com.

* Although he is a cuck.